aired: April 4, 2013
Bailey: "So, I've got the
results of your genome sequencing. We weren't able to get a clear read
of Zola's sample. Sometimes we just have to run it again. But yours came
out."
Meredith: "And?"
Bailey: "First off, I just need to ask you a few questions. We have a couple of different kinds of information here, so…"
Meredith: "I have the gene, just say it."
Bailey: "Look, this test gives us tons of information. Some of it is clear, and some of it isn't. We don't want to jump into anything without careful consideration."
Meredith: "I've carefully considered. Do I have the Alzheimer's gene?"
Bailey: "You've got to let me answer this questionnaire."
Meredith: "Bailey, you're my mentor and my friend. And I respect your work. But I'm telling you, if you don't answer my questions, I will punch you in the face."
Bailey: "You have tested positive to more than one genetic markers for Alzheimer's..."
Meredith: "And?"
Bailey: "First off, I just need to ask you a few questions. We have a couple of different kinds of information here, so…"
Meredith: "I have the gene, just say it."
Bailey: "Look, this test gives us tons of information. Some of it is clear, and some of it isn't. We don't want to jump into anything without careful consideration."
Meredith: "I've carefully considered. Do I have the Alzheimer's gene?"
Bailey: "You've got to let me answer this questionnaire."
Meredith: "Bailey, you're my mentor and my friend. And I respect your work. But I'm telling you, if you don't answer my questions, I will punch you in the face."
Bailey: "You have tested positive to more than one genetic markers for Alzheimer's..."
Derek: "You have tested positive for the risk factor genes, it doesn't mean you're gonna get it."
Meredith: "I know what it means."
Derek: "It is entirely possible it means nothing at all!"
Meredith: "We need an updated will. I want you to call the lawyer."
Derek: "Slow down, even if you get the disease, it's decades away!"
Meredith: "It might not be. We have a child. And we're having another child. Look, right now it says that Lexie is Zola's legal guardian if anything happens to us. That's not going to work."
Derek: "No, but…"
Meredith: "Derek, we were in a plane crash. We don't need Alzheimer's to..."
Derek: "Potential Alzheimer's."
Meredith: "We need an updated will".
Derek: "Okay, you're right. I will contact the guy."
Meredith: "Okay."
Meredith: "I know what it means."
Derek: "It is entirely possible it means nothing at all!"
Meredith: "We need an updated will. I want you to call the lawyer."
Derek: "Slow down, even if you get the disease, it's decades away!"
Meredith: "It might not be. We have a child. And we're having another child. Look, right now it says that Lexie is Zola's legal guardian if anything happens to us. That's not going to work."
Derek: "No, but…"
Meredith: "Derek, we were in a plane crash. We don't need Alzheimer's to..."
Derek: "Potential Alzheimer's."
Meredith: "We need an updated will".
Derek: "Okay, you're right. I will contact the guy."
Meredith: "Okay."
Derek: "The lawyer sent over the email forms. We need two names, the guarding and the backup. Before it was Lexie, Cristina and Owen."
Meredith: "So Cristina, and which one of your sisters d you want as a backup?"
Derek: "Cristina doesn't want children."
Meredith: "This isn't children, it's Zola and fetus."
Derek: "Stop calling the baby fetus!"
Meredith: "Well, she will love him whatever his name is."
Derek: "Alright, talk to her and see what she says."
Meredith: "I know what she'll say."
Derek: "And I'll be wrong and that will be good for everybody."
Meredith: "So Cristina, and which one of your sisters d you want as a backup?"
Derek: "Cristina doesn't want children."
Meredith: "This isn't children, it's Zola and fetus."
Derek: "Stop calling the baby fetus!"
Meredith: "Well, she will love him whatever his name is."
Derek: "Alright, talk to her and see what she says."
Meredith: "I know what she'll say."
Derek: "And I'll be wrong and that will be good for everybody."
Meredith: "You were right, Cristina only wants to be the cool aunt."
Derek: "Oh, I'm sorry. I wish I was wrong."
Meredith: "That's okay. What about Kathleen?"
Derek: "What about Lizzie? You two got along."
Meredith: "Oh, I forgot about Lizzie."
Derek: "It's a disaster plan. Most disasters don't happen."
Meredith: "They do. To us."
Derek: "That's true. And we have survived an unusual number of bad things. And at this point it ups our odds."
Meredith: "Haha, just send the forms."
Derek: "Apparently, we have never filled out the health care directive. The lawyer wants that too."
Meredith: "Oh, you know all of this. I don't wanna be a potato. No extraordinary measures taken if it's obviously at the end."
Derek: "He wants it in writing."
Meredith: "Oh, it doesn't matter. We both know you're gonna give me a lethal dose of morphine the second I start to forget where my keys are. I am not kidding. Before we knew my mother was sick, she couldn't remember anything I've ever said to her. And I thought it was because she didn't give a crap about me. I don't wanna put my kids through that. You'll give me a lethal dose, we'll hold hands and I'll fade off into the night."
Derek: "We will cross that bridge when we come to it."
Derek: "Oh, I'm sorry. I wish I was wrong."
Meredith: "That's okay. What about Kathleen?"
Derek: "What about Lizzie? You two got along."
Meredith: "Oh, I forgot about Lizzie."
Derek: "It's a disaster plan. Most disasters don't happen."
Meredith: "They do. To us."
Derek: "That's true. And we have survived an unusual number of bad things. And at this point it ups our odds."
Meredith: "Haha, just send the forms."
Derek: "Apparently, we have never filled out the health care directive. The lawyer wants that too."
Meredith: "Oh, you know all of this. I don't wanna be a potato. No extraordinary measures taken if it's obviously at the end."
Derek: "He wants it in writing."
Meredith: "Oh, it doesn't matter. We both know you're gonna give me a lethal dose of morphine the second I start to forget where my keys are. I am not kidding. Before we knew my mother was sick, she couldn't remember anything I've ever said to her. And I thought it was because she didn't give a crap about me. I don't wanna put my kids through that. You'll give me a lethal dose, we'll hold hands and I'll fade off into the night."
Derek: "We will cross that bridge when we come to it."
Meredith: "Cristina said she will pull the trigger if it comes to that."
Derek: "You're my wife. Can we make the decision together if we're gonna throw in the towel?"
Meredith: "Sounds fair. It's not gonna be easy on you if I start to lose it."
Derek: "Oh, don't worry. You're a project even with all your marbles. I brought you something."
Meredith: "You did?"
Derek: "I had Bailey to do my genome."
Meredith: "You did? High risk for liver cancer and prostate cancer? Wow."
Derek: "Yeah, you're telling me."
Meredith: "Male pattern baldness?"
Derek: "Late onset, apparently."
Meredith: "Heroin addiction?"
Derek: "I'm a real prize. It's all crap. We didn't get one single definite. We all got maybe's".
Meredith: "Maybe we'll live forever."
Derek: "Maybe we do, and maybe I'll become a bald heroin addict."
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